If you’ve been paying attention to Twitter recently, then you’ll know there have been a few semi-viral tweets reminiscing about and clamouring for the return of Masters football.
We’re not sure whether it’s the boredom from football’s postponement or whether we’re getting more nostalgic with age, but Masters football has once again entered the consciousness of football fans across Britain.
So Sky Sports has a potential goldmine in their hands, an audience clearly still exists for that kind of thing and it would probably get more viewing figures than whatever Sky Sports fills the time with when football isn’t on.
With this in mind, here is how Bournemouth could potentially line up for a Masters Football match. Before we get into the players however, a few rules for selection must be set out:
- Only players 35 and over are eligible and they must not be currently playing, coaching, managing or have any other role at a club that isn’t only ambassadorial.
- Where possible, club legend games will be used to narrow selection choices.
- If a player has health conditions that would prevent them from playing, then they will not be included.
Age: 49
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 2012-2013
Club Highlight: Keeping four clean sheets in a row between December 2012 and January 2013.
Club Lowlight: Having his contract terminated before the end of the season.
Even Bournemouth fans would be forgiven for forgetting this Premier League legend played for the club.
Picked here by virtue of every other Bournemouth keeper either coaching or still playing, David James made just 19 appearances for the Cherries before having his contract terminated in March 2013, missing out on Bournemouth’s promotion to the Championship.
James, who played well into his 40s, would probably fare pretty well between the sticks in Masters football.
Sylvain Distin (Defender)
Age:
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 2015-2016
Club Highlight: Becoming one of Bournemouth’s first Premier League signings.
Club Lowlight: Barely playing.
Sylvain Distin’s name is destined to be a tricky answer for a pub quiz question that is: “Which foreign outfield player has made the most Premier League appearances?”
Distin played for five different Premier League clubs over the course of his 16-year career in the Premier League, the last of which was Bournemouth.
A smart signing considering it was the Cherries’ first season in the Premier League, the ageing centre-back spent most of his time in Dorset on the bench, before hanging up his boots at the end of his spell at the club.
Still, he’s only recently been retired and we’re sure he’d have enough left in him to cope with Masters football.
Darren Anderton (Midfielder)
Age: 48
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 2006-2008
Club Highlight: Scoring an out-of-this-world volley in his last professional game.
Club Lowlight: Suffering relegation to League Two in 2007/08
Joining Bournemouth just as his footballing career was winding down, Darren Anderton became a cult hero for the Cherries during the toughest period in their history.
He’s been retired for over a decade, but having featured for England and been a regular fixture in the Premier League for most of his career, we’re sure he’d still do bits in the low-intensity game that is Masters football.
Matt Holland (Midfielder)
Age: 46
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 1995-1997
Club Highlight: Becoming Bournemouth’s captain at a young age.
Club Lowlight: Leaving after just two years.
Though he is better remembered for his successful spells with Ipswich Town and Charlton Athletic, Bournemouth is where Matt Holland made his name, joining the Dorset-based side following his release by West Ham.
A goalscoring midfielder during his time at the club, Holland was a key player for the Cherries and even became captain at a youthful age before earning a move to Ipswich in 1997. And we’re sure this guy would pop-in more than a few goals in Masters football.
Matt Tubbs (Forward)
Age: 35
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 2008, 2012-2015
Club Highlight: Scoring a goal and getting an assist on his debut for the club in 2012.
Club Lowlight: Not doing much else after that.
Part of Bournemouth’s academy, Matt Tubbs failed to make the grade at the Cherries and became a prolific non-league striker for Salisbury City. Over 100 goals under his belt later, Bournemouth decided to take another chance on the striker while they were struggling in League Two in 2008, but he failed to impress.
He returned to Bournemouth after rediscovering his goalscoring touch, but struggled for consistency and spent most of his contract at Dean Court on loan at other clubs.
Still, having played as recently as 2018/19, Tubbs would be deadly up-front playing Masters football for the Cherries, and we’re sure he’d be proud to wear the red-and-black again.
Kenwyne Jones (Forward)
Age: 35
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 2015
Club Highlight: Scoring an equalising goal against Ipswich on his debut.
Club Lowlight: Not making even a single start for Bournemouth.
Yes, Kenwyne Jones played for Bournemouth.
Cherries fans puzzled at his inclusion would do well to keep in mind that most of your striking legends are currently coaching at your club. Still, Jones didn’t play enough to be considered awful and he did kinda help Bournemouth win the Championship in 2015.
Also, this guy would absolutely tear up Masters football.
Substitutes
Jamie Vincent (Defender)
Age:
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 1994-1995, 1996-1999
Club Highlight: Being a key part of Bournemouth’s promotion challenge in 1998/99.
Club Lowlight: Controversially leaving the club in 1999.
Considered to be one of the best left-backs in Bournemouth history, Jamie Vincent had been a regular starter for Cherries in the three years he played for the club.
His legacy at Bournemouth was dampened slightly when he moved to Huddersfield halfway through 1998/99, just as the Cherries were challenging for promotion. The decision to sell Vincent angered fans and coincided with a slump that saw Bournemouth miss out on the play-offs.
John Bailey (Midfielder)
Age: 50
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 1995-2000
Club Highlight: Scoring Bournemouth’s first and to-date, only goal at Wembley.
Club Lowlight: Being forced into retirement at only 31.
Another cult-hero, John Bailey spent all of his professional career at Bournemouth, racking up nearly 150 appearances for the club in the five years he spent there. His most notable moment came in the Football League Trophy final in 1999, where he scored Bournemouth’s only goal in a 2-1 defeat to Grimsby Town.
At 50, he’d be a little rusty, but it’d be an absolute pleasure to see him in a Bournemouth shirt once again.
Jo Kuffour (Forward)
Age:
Years Spent at Bournemouth: 2007-2008
Club Highlight: Was Bournemouth’s top goalscorer in 2007/08.
Club Lowlight: Being part of the Bournemouth side that suffered relegation to League Two.
A lower-league journeyman, Bournemouth was one of the many clubs Jo Kuffour played for during his 16-year career.
His time at Dean Court was one of the more prolific spells in his career, scoring 12 goals in 48 appearances despite Bournemouth’s relegation to League Two in his only season at the club.
At 38, Kuffour would probably do pretty well scoring past men who are well into their 40s.
Let’